I vividly remember the day when I first stumbled upon this drama, My Liberation Notes, on Netflix. I was instantly drawn to its raw and unfiltered portrayal of human emotions and mundane life. I shared it with my circle of friends back then, hoping they would share my enthusiasm. To my dismay, they found it strangely off-putting. They could be right, you know? But...
I sought solace in the words of Mi Jung, the complex protagonist of the drama. I remember writing the dialouges in my diary, transcribing her monologues with an almost desperate urgency. Little did I know that within a year, my world would drastically change but not so much. The friends I once held dear drifted away. I managed to graduate, albeit with great difficulty, and landed a remote job that offered little fulfillment. But, I am isolated and alone. Despite my dreams of escape, I found myself trapped in the confines of my room, where hours blurred into days and monotony reigned supreme. Back then, I used to
sit in my room and study all day, desiring and thinking, "One day, I will get a job
and leave this place and everyone here." And, now it seems like a distant echo lost in the abyss of my reality. I am still sitting in room. Stuck in my room.
In the midst of this suffocating existence, I decided to revisit that drama, hoping to recapture the reassuring emotions it once evoked within me. Night after night, I completed my work, eagerly immersing myself in the familiar scenes, only to find tears streaming down my face as Mi Jung's words struck a chord deep within my soul. It became a ritual, an emotional release that accompanied me into the lonely nights, where I surrendered myself to the overwhelming sadness and emptiness that enveloped me.
There has always been an ache in my heart, an unfulfilled longing for freedom and liberation that has haunted me since the beginning. It's a feeling I've tried to suppress, burying it beneath the weight of responsibilities and unspoken dreams. Desperate to find an outlet, I turned to writing, pouring my thoughts into a blog that remains unseen and untouched by others. Its existence, like a hidden secret, offers me a sliver of solace—a place where I can lay my soul bare open without fear of judgment.
This drama might not resonate with everyone, and it may not possess the power to break the chains of my mundane reality, but it is undeniably real. It has become my anchor, a source of validation for the strange and unsettling experiences that have colored my life. It doesn't necessarily make everything better or worse; rather, it justifies the complexity of my emotions, offering a source of understanding and assurance in a world that often feels indifferent.
Every time Mi Jung's monologues resonate in my ears, I can feel a slow burn in my throat, a tightening in my chest as tears well up in my eyes. It's a visceral reaction that etches itself into my memory, a reminder of the profound impact this drama has had on me. I know deep down that this connection will linger, that I will find myself drawn back to it time and time again.
In a bittersweet way, it's both comforting and disheartening. Comforting because it reminds me that I'm not alone in my struggles, that someone out there understands the depths of my emotions. Disheartening because it serves as a constant reminder of my longing for something more, something beyond the confines of this suffocating room.
- Oizys.